The Diary
by shunjouromantic
Summary: Eli visits Nozomi's house and makes a mistake.
Eli could be typically found in a few places. School, specially her classes or the student council room, her home, the small shop where she gets parfaits, and Nozomi's house. Currently, she was in the latter. Nozomi walked out for bit and has asked Eli to wait in her room for her. The reason? Eli couldn't exactly remember. She may or may not have been spacing out. Eli awkwardly stood in the room, realizing she couldn't even recall why Nozomi had left. She got embarrassed and looked around the room, maybe for a seat of some sort. She soon noticed a small notebook on a drawer next to the bed. It was an average composition journal with no title written on the black white square. She picked it up, examined it curiously.

 _'_ _I probably should not be touching Nozomi's things…'_ the rational side of Eli's brain thought. Yet the childish, curious side decided it would be a good idea to open the book and read it. Her eyes grew as she read the first page.

"Journal,

Nico told me I should keep a journal of sorts to 'vent' my feelings. She claims that I 'need to express myself more' and 'am not open enough with my thoughts'. So I decided t-"

Eli had enough. A blush grew on her face as she read the words.

' _I should really not be reading this,'_ she thought. Yet the journal in her hands beckoned. She spends a lot of time with Nozomi right? Nozomi must have written about her, right?

 _'_ _What… What if Nozomi actually dislikes me? What if she's just putting up with me? I know I'm stubborn and probably really annoying… It's possible that she may_ hate _me,'_ the negative side of Eli's brain commented.

 _'_ _If I read the parts she wrote about me maybe I'll find out… Nico's right… Nozomi wouldn't tell me how she really feels.'_ Eli began flipping through a few pages. Some of them were fuller than others, telling about how her day went and her exciting adventures at school. One of the pages stuck out to her. It had a single sentence written in it.

"Journal,

I'm so gay."

Eli was a bit a shocked and confused. Nozomi was gay? She had a feeling but was a bit dense when it came to understanding others. She continued to search through the journal and began to get impatient to find any pages specifically about her, she landed on a page that had her name written a few times.

"Journal,

Today was a fairly average day. After school (which we didn't learn many new concept today. Mostly review, skip a few days back to see exactly), I went to the student council room with Eli. This is typically an average occurrence, yet it seemed different today. Eli was working hard on the paperwork and couldn't really seem to focus. I kept looking around the room and possibly at Eli. Maybe. Most likely. She's really pretty, you know? Well, of course you don't. You're a book. Anyways, Eli. She's so wonderful and pretty and I wish I could be gayer with her but I doubt she would be comfortable with that. I don't want to impose or be a burden to her (or hurt myself, or lose a friend, or lose a best friend, and the list goes on). She's probably as straight as a board, anyway. Maybe. Most likely. This is probably going to be the last page I write on the subject, for my feelings will most likely be the same in the near future. Updates will be transcribed at a later date.

I'm just kinda scared."

Eli's brain seemed to stop functioning after that moment.

 _'_ _Nozomi… Likes me… romantically?'_ That was not what Eli was speaking to find. She could have sworn Nozomi would at least be mad at her. A small smile grew on her face as realization hit her. Someone she really cares about cares about her back. Her closest friend doesn't secretly despise her.

 _'_ _Wait a minute… It's romantic…'_ and at that thought the door opened.

"Elichi, I'm back," Nozomi stated. Eli's head turned quickly to her friend with a face of regret and fear. She saw Nozomi's slight smile form into something that wasn't a smile. Her mouth contorted downwards as she noticed the purple journal Eli held in her face.

"Elichi… Did you read my journal?"

"I… I may have," Eli responded slowly. She was afraid yet didn't want to lie to her best friend.

"Did you read the entry about you? The one… mostly about you?" Nozomi asked. Eli hesitated with the answer.

"P-possibly," Eli knew it was wrong. She knew she shouldn't have read it. Now look what she's done! She ruined her best friend's (or possible ex-best friend) trust in her. She truly was an idiot. Eli didn't know what to expect of the outcome of this chain of events.

"I'm sorry," Nozomi said. She looked sad, upset, embarrassed, and what seemed to be shame. Eli was left in the dust.

"Huh?" Eli expressed her confusion verbally, "I'm the one who should be sorry, shouldn't I? I'm the one who read your private thoughts, why are you sorry?" It came out bluntly yet it got the point across. Eli mentally slapped her forehead for the awkward series of sentences.

"I'm the one who developed some… unwanted feelings," Nozomi looked down. It looked like tears gathered in her eyes. Eli put down the book and took a few steps forward. She wrapped her arms around the shorter girl.

"No, no. It's not your fault… I'm the one who made the mistake. I should have respected your privacy like a good friend," Eli muttered. She easily admitted her to mistake. It was her best friend after all, she should be clear with her.

"So… what do you think?" Nozomi asked. Her voice was horse, like if she was crying (which she probably was, Eli thought).

"I'm… Not sure, honestly," Eli responded. Nozomi grew stiff for a moment and attempted an escape from the embrace.

"It's not bad!" Eli quickly fixed. "I'm just not sure how to react. It doesn't make me uncomfortable, its fine. I just think I need a few hours to think about it."

Nozomi smiled into Eli's shoulder. She was relieved. Her friend didn't not want to be and didn't completely reject her. She hugged Eli a bit tighter.

"Thank you."

Notes:

I'm not an author.


End file.
